Archive for the Movie Review Category

The Last Jedi Review (Spoilers)

Posted in Films, Movie Review with tags , , , on December 19, 2017 by boccobsblog


OK, I have seen The Last Jedi twice now and I’m ready to review. The critics have praised the film, but the fans seem split nearly 50/50. In B3 style, we’ll do the Good, the Badass, and Ugly.

The Good

Rey’s Parentage – I was relieved that Rey wasn’t a Skywalker or a Kenobi. Not everyone has to be someone’s child. A galaxy is a big place. Plus, all the stupid fanboy theories were wrong, which is great.

Snoke’s Background – Again screw you stupid fanboys. “Snoke is Boba Fett!” These theories annoy me and never have any solid evidence to back them up. Snoke was a McGuffin, let’s move on.

Chewie Kicking in Luke’s Door – Chewie always delivers. What else is there to say? Though I would have liked to have seen some interaction between Chewie and Luke, I mean they have been friends for like forty or fifty years.

Benicio Del Toro – Benny the Bull does a great job, even if his betrayal is super predictable.

The Badass

Hamil’s Performance – I love me some Skywalker, but Mark Hamil’s acting in the OT is just OK. Fast forward to 2018 and MH delivers a seriously badass performance. The greatest moment in the film is when he struts through the hole in the blast door to meet the First Order and Kylo Ren. (Side note: does anyone want to cosplay as Kylo Ren and Stimpy with me at Gen Con 2018?)

The Throneroom Fight – The fight that follows Snoke’s death is pretty sweet. though did you notice there wasn’t a lightsaber battle in this movie?

“Oh, they hate that ship!” – That is the greatest line in the movie! I laughed my awkward concave ass off at that one.

Holdo’s Jump – I’ve been waiting for this since forever. Though, I think we could do with more Laura Dern, IMO.

The Ugly

Leia’s Peter Pan Spacewalk – This was fucking lame. Like Gungan bad. Carrie Fisher is dead, this was a perfect opportunity to let the rest of the old guard go. We have a suitable new guard replacement with Vice Adm. Holdo (had).

The Weird Milking – This was weird and should have ended up on the cutting room floor. Same with the giant fish. They already showed a catch of normal-sized drying, why did we need an Episode One weirdo fish?

The Plot – The largest problem with the Last Jedi was the main plot of the First Order slowly chasing the Resistance in some kind of OJ White Bronco chase at 13 MPH. The First Order had literally thousands of TIE fighters, shuttles and support craft that could outrun the big Mon Cal ship. Seriously, each star destroyer carries 72 TIE fighters. Not to mention the obvious question, why not just jump in front of them?

The Gender Inequality Over-Correction – The new  Star Wars movies have some strong female characters, which is awesome. The problem I saw with the Last Jedi, is that the male characters have been made into reckless & unwise (Poe) or completely useless & unwise (Finn), while every female character is a Leia-level badass. As my wife pointed out, the men have all become detergent commercial dads, this weak, useless idiot that needs to be instructed by his wife and bossy daughter. You don’t need weak male characters to have strong female roles.

Old Tropes – This movie was about killing the past, but it still used many of the old tropes, Dagobah Island, throne room betrayals, charging super lasers, etc. Each had a slight twist, so we’re getting closer, but we still rely on Falcon Ex Machina moments to save the day.

Finn – I like Finn, I think John Boyega does a great job, but Finn has no role in this film, and his subplot is literally useless and tacked on. I would like to have seen Poe replace Rose as P & F have some great buddy comedy potential.

Hux – The general was kind of a tool in FA, but is comically absurd in LJ.

But, but…Porgs! You didn’t mention Porgs?! The Porgs were on the screen for less a minute, not long enough to offend. All in all, I enjoyed the Last Jedi. It was good, but not great. Hopefully, the third movie can be original. We’ve plundered the OT for all its goodness, and know it is time for some original content.


Spoiler Free Review: Wonder Woman

Posted in Comic Books, Films, Movie Review, Uncategorized with tags , , on June 16, 2017 by boccobsblog


Special guest blogger: Ann Johnson

The following is a spoiler free review of Wonder Woman, which is much harder to do than I had thought going into this. Where do you draw the line? Can I assume that the readers already know that Diana is an Amazon from Themyscira who, after rescuing Steve Trevor, leaves Paradise Island and becomes Wonder Woman? Oh crap…really? I mean, did you not see the trailers? Read any of the comics? Fine, that was the last spoiler. Crybaby. I am sticking to the Good, Badass, and Ugly format WITHOUT any other plot spoilers.

The Good

  • A good basic introduction to the character of Wonder Woman as she herself is introduced to the world outside of Themyscira. The exploration of her moral compass in the context of a global war adds depth to her character and gives her room to grow in the subsequent movies.
  • Strong peripheral characters such as Etta, Charlie, Sameer, and The Chief brought an otherwise simple story some much needed depth.
  • Elena Anaya brings sympathy to her portrayal of the villainous Dr. Maru.
  • The contrast between the modern Diana in the bookends and the young Diana in the story is well played and opens the door for additional stand-alone films to show her growth and progression.

The Badass

  • Can we talk about Robin Wright for a second? Her portrayal as Antiope was fully realized and dynamic. She fully illustrated a different archetype of woman, not only is she more mature but she shows physical and emotional strength, grace, and intelligence that is woefully underrepresented in cinema. Badass = Beautiful!
  • Some of the most beautifully choreographed fights EVER.
  • The lame lasso of truth became something truly useful and surprising, adding to the visual appeal of the battle scenes.
  • The cello riffs in the WW theme music are insane, edgy, and powerful.

The Ugly

  • Ridiculously predictable. Pay even the slightest bit of attention to what’s going on and the plot is laughably simplistic. I chalked this up to the framing of the story as an introduction to the newly realized Wonder Woman.
  • Just stop with the slow motion… seriously… we get it. I found the way too frequent slow mo more than a little distracting.
  • Chris Pine was weirdly flat. His intended comic moments didn’t land and I found myself not really caring much about his character.
  • David Thewlis’ moustache…. just no…

Gal Gadot put in a solid performance as Diana/Wonder Woman. Her portrayal fully embraces strength, compassion, and tenacity in a truly engaging introduction of a very dynamic character into the DC cinematic pantheon. I am not certain the movie lives up to the 92% on Rotten tomatoes. The CGI stroke fest that is the final battle fell somewhat flat along with Chris Pine’s performance as Steve Trevor. Danny Huston’s villainous Ludendorff was over the top and more weird and laughable than scary. That being said, I would totally watch it again and look forward to the Justice League movie.

(Thank you, Ann! Great review.)

Spoiler-Free Review: Logan

Posted in Films, Gaming Culture, Movie Review, Uncategorized with tags , , on March 6, 2017 by boccobsblog


The following is a spoiler-free review of Logan. Keeping with B3 traditions here is the good, the badass, and the ugly as they apply to the third (and maybe Hugh Jackman’s last) Wolverine stand-alone film.

The Good

  • It’s dark, gritty, and bleak. This is not a cheesy comic book movie. No tights.
  • Dafne Kee puts on a solid debut performance.
  • The Deadpool intro is funny, and gives us an Easter egg that points towards another Marvel favorite in the works. No, it’s not Howard the Duck.

The Badass

  • This is the best on-screen performance of Patrick Stewart’s career. He nails the helplessness and loss of dignity that comes with old age.
  • The movie is savage. This R-rated Logan is the first time we actually see a version of Wolverine that comes close to the comics.
  • It is a good movie, not just a good superhero movie. It is well-shot, it has a great score, and the dialogue is believable.

The Ugly

  • The plot is a bit light.. Get from point A to point B. But there are some serious feels along the way, so we give them a pass.
  • The timeline is a bit confusing. Is this part of the First Class / Days of the Future Past thread, or the original X-Men trilogy? Is it something new? There is enough subtext to fill in the gaps, but it isn’t explicit.
  • The antagonist is a bit lame. He looks like the love child of a boy band reject and a T-100.

All in all, I truly think that Logan is the strongest Marvel film yet. It currently has a Rotten Tomatoes score in the low nineties, and I think that will only climb. It is easily the best superhero movie since the Dark Knight (2008).

Grab Logan on Blu-Ray

Underworld: Awakening, Film Review

Posted in Movie Review with tags , on January 25, 2012 by boccobsblog

The first Underworld movie was amazing, so much so that it spawned three sequels. And while UW2 and 3 did little to live up to the original, the fourth installment hopes to revive the franchise with the return of Kate Beckinsale in her role as Selene.  The following review has some spoilers, so be warned.

The Good

Kate Beckinsale looks great

The sets keep the same dark feel as the original

The film is (for the most part) well-acted

The Bad

The film seems very rushed. And coming in at onlt an hour and twenty-eight minutes it seems incomplete

I’m tired of 3d. I don’t see what it added. At 13 bucks a ticket I left feeling robbed

The film fails to bring anything new to the table

Scott Speedman is not in the film(except in flashback from the first film), but Michael Corvin appears several times and the body double looked nothing like Speedman and leaves you wishing that they just left the character out rather than insult your intelligence with a poor stand in

Handguns with 15 round clips still fire 78 bullets before needing to be reloaded (nothing new there, but it still irks me)

The Ugly

The new hybrid looks like Samara from The Ring, and does nothing in the film, save to look stupid and hang on people’s back.

The movie goes too far and abandons any physics what so ever. OK, I know, genre fiction tests, blurs, and often ignores the laws of physics, but UW4 goes to a level of absurdity that forces the viewer to suspend disbelief to such a level that it infringes on enjoyment.  My biggest complaint is the character Quint (played by Kris Holden Ried), he is a werewolf that has been injected with a serum that makes him regenerate instantly and increases his muscle mass. Fine, nbd, but the 150 pound Quint become literally the size of an elephant when in lycan form. How in the hell does a 150-pound man become a 1,000 pound lycan? Where does the extra mass come from? He shifts back and forth, back and forth, 150lbs – 1,000 lbs  Give me a break. A 150 pound man should be a 150 pound lycan.

Hollywood needs to stop trying to create bigger explosions every movie and try to write detailed stories and memorable characters.

Overall Underworld: Awakening is a complete train wreck and should be avoided (or at most, rented)


Conan the Barbarian Remake August 2011

Posted in Gaming News, Movie Review with tags , , , , on March 19, 2011 by boccobsblog

Tonight the wife and I went out to see Adjustment Bureau, as we left I happened to see a poster for a remake of Conan the Barbarian. Maybe my geekdar is on the fritz but I thought I would have heard if a new Conan movie was coming out this August.

A third Conan movie, King Conan, has been rumored for twenty years, but it has never been more than a rumor. In fact a visit to Internet Movie Database said this about the possibility of a third installment in the series:

The third Schwarzenegger Conan movie, tentatively called “King Conan: Crown of Iron”, has been in various stages of development for the past twenty years. It has been close to being made on a couple of occasions, but something always came in the way, whether it be creative differences, scheduling problems or budget. The studio has now pulled the plug on that movie once and for all, and moved on. Many rumors, and even trivia on IMDb, have suggested the Kevin Sorbo movie, Kull the Conqueror, was the original sequel to Conan the Destroyer, called Conan the Conqueror. Since the script was never used, however, it was changed from Conan to Kull and made from him Alantis rather than a Cimmerian.

Ok, fair enough. Since he became the Govinator I kind of made peace with the idea that the Conan line was dead. (At least the Conan line with Arnold.)

Then a few years ago I heard that Ron Perlman (of Hellboy fame and Beauty and Beast shame) was going to take on the role of King Conan. Well it turns out that Ron will be in the film, but as the character Corin, not Conan.

Conan will be played by Jason Momoa from Stargate: Atlantis.

I’m not sure how I feel about this. My first reaction is that remakes ALWAYS suck. My second reaction is that while Momoa is a buff dude that could easily bench-press my taco eating ass, he isn’t fit to hold 1982 Arnold’s jockstrap. Hmmm…a seven time Mr. Olympia or a dude that models for a living…  I’m just saying…  Also, it is in 3D which make me die a little bit inside. (3D movies make my eyes bleed.)

As always with movies, I will hope for the best and then spend a few days cursing and crying alone in the basement living off shameful tears and used dryer sheets.

Regardless I must see any movie that has swords in it, it is the geek code.

Conan 2011 movie website (has a teaser)

IMDb entry